Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Mom's Eulogy for John and John's Eugoogly

This is a copy of what Mom read for John (her own words and an email a dear friend wrote about John) on Friday followed by words John wrote for us to share.

    I am truly honored and overwhelmed by the turnout.  So many of you have shared stories and pictures over the past few days  A dear friend shared these thoughts.
   " One thing that came to me as I pondered the "why" of this is that I hope no one will ever say that he lost his battle to brain cancer.   Out of the blue brain cancer struck and he never stopped fighting.  In the process he accomplished so much - he showed people how to stand up to this disease.  He had a sense of the big picture - that brain cancer has to be cured and he took up that fight.  He raised money for research.  He shared through his blog and friendships so much information that will help others appreciate life and know how to confront disease when it comes - and it comes to everyone.
    John Paul showed what family means - you all shine as examples of caring and love.
    So brain cancer lost a lot of rounds in this fight with John Paul.  If he gets to rest now, it is not because he lost the fight, it is because he has accomplished enough for one cool guy to do.
    Tears accompany this - John Paul is so young.  But then I fear that he accomplished more in his years than I have in mine."
    John was John.  He left a lasting impression on all of us.  Even though he never asked to be anyone’s inspiration or hero, he became just that.  He did it by living each day …and in the past few years, living them with honesty and no regrets.

John left a few thoughts to share with all of you, so I will read them uncensored….

I am so arrogant and so controlling that yes I wrote my own eugoogly.  I really wanted to say things.  I’m not sure what the turnout looks like but I want to tell all of you some of the guiding principles in my life.  There are about 20 things I can say I did every day that made me the way I am.
·             Laugh,
·            get under someone’s skin for sport,
·           make a provocative statement which may be true,
·            tell a very descriptive story,
·           make a joke at someone else’s expense,
·           laugh,
·          • cry,
·          • get angry,
      • over extend yourself,
      • give unsolicited advice,
      • get stressed for no reason,
      • find one current event to form a crazy opinion on and tell everyone you can think of,
      • laugh,
      • cry,
      • and love the people in your life

Today you came for some reason but I liked to think you’d be here to honor what I wanted.  I had every right to not write a word to anyone.  I had every right to not see anyone.  And I had every right to quit so long ago.  I don’t know who is here obviously, but I hope that whoever is here, and whoever wanted to be here is what I imagined I left behind.  And that is an army of people who knew that I loved them as much as I could.  Who will always remember me as I hoped they would and not whatever I became as my mind wilted away or as my strength disappeared.  And I’d also ask that when you shed tears, when you get angry or feel agony, when you want to look at the sky with anger and want to shout, that instead you use that energy to make a difference in a way that aligns with the goal I have had all along.  That goal was to have people I met think they were a little better for having known me.  Guess I was the first one to go to bed at this party but don’t worry I’ll see you all on the other side.  Count on it.

Good night sweet prince may flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.

1 comment:

Beth McKenna said...

Beautiful! I so wish I could have been there. My parents said it was an amazing tribute to a life well lived.

Love Beth